Family Business

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A lot of times people will tell me that my marriage is perfect and that they wish they can have a marriage like mine. Well I’m here to tell you that my marriage is FAR from perfect, and you CAN have a blessed marriage. You won’t and shouldn’t have a marriage like mine because your marriage is YOURS, it’s unique and it’s also no ones business but YOU and YOUR husband. You see, that’s what helps keep our marriage healthy, (that and of course the Lord as our foundation), I don’t go running to Facebook and post a nasty status each time my husband and I have a disagreement. I also don’t bash my husband to my friends either. I try to hold my husband’s name up high because we are ONE so if I’m bashing him, I’m bashing myself as well. I’m in complete disbelief each time I see a girl post a status about how pissed off she is at her significant other, how they’re “trifling,” and good for nothing, then two seconds later she’ll be like “aww I love my babe, he’s so sweet.” I’m literally left with a blank stare each time. No one needs to know what’s going on between you and your significant other, especially if you’re married.

“A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like a decay in his bones” {Proverbs 12:4}

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When you talk to others about your marital problems, you’re opening up a door for them to put their opinions out there and tell you what you should do with YOUR marriage. And let’s face it, not all advice is the best advice. You should be getting advice from the one who made marriage, the ONLY one who has the ability to bless your marriage, God. I know ladies, it’s hard sometimes to just keep your emotions in and not go off on your man (I’m still working on this myself.) In addition to praying to God when times get tough, I also strongly believe all married couples should have at least one good person they can have as their mediator when times get really tough. Someone like a pastor, counselor, or maybe even a couple that’s been in the game for a really long time.

“Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.” {Proverbs 12:1)

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It’s not easy to bite your tongue and stop yourself from saying hurtful things in the heat of the moment, but imagine how much harder it is if you have your friend’s voice in your head saying “girl if I were you, I wouldn’t put up with that!” or “Girl you have every right to be mad, you better let him know!” This also applies to talking about your spouse with family members. You may think it’s innocent and they only want what’s best for you, but after time they’ll start growing a bitter heart towards your spouse. Imagine if you tell your mom, sister, brother, dad, etc. each time you and your spouse get into an argument. What do you think will happen? I’ll tell you what, you’ll have all these different inputs on how you should handle YOUR marriage and they’ll give him/her the side-eye each time your spouse comes around. So DON’T do it. Remember, your marriage is between YOU and YOUR husband, that’s it. I’ve discussed the topic of submission before and it’s an important one for ladies to understand that in order to have a healthy successful marriage, you MUST submit to your husband’s and they’re supposed to submit themselves to the Lord. If you’re like me, sometimes this goes in one ear and out the other, but when I do submit to my husband and let him lead, there are no arguments. Now, this does NOT, I repeat does NOT mean I don’t have a voice in my marriage or an opinion because anyone who knows me (especially my husband) knows that I’m a very passionate person … it just means I choose and pick my battles, and the ones where I’m trying to lead my household I’ll NEVER win (that is if I want a blessed marriage).

Love,

Mrs. Luster

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